Ever had your car stolen? Or more conceivably, ever had your neighbor’s car alarm go off for two hours at 3am? Well now a company exists who hopes to kill two birds with one foggy, flashy stone. A company called FlashFog Security has made a new type of car alarm that doesn’t depend on noise at all. Instead of making the now universally ignored alarm sound featured in most theft deterrents, the FlashFog system concentrates on making a car virtually impossible to steal by assaulting your other senses.

First the FlashFog system rapidly disperses a cloud of glycol, filling the car in just a few seconds with thick, dense, harmless fog. And if a car instantly hotboxing itself isn’t enough to make a thief crap in their pants, the FlashFog system has a second line of defense. After blasting out the fog the system immediately begins strobing rapidly, blinding anybody in the cloud of confusion.

“FlashFog’s unprecedented power overwhelms even professional thieves who know it’s coming. The fog alone is incredibly disorienting but FlashFog doesn’t stop there. The terrifyingly bright strobe light hits him 12 times per second, forcing his eyes into constant shock.”

On top of disorienting fog and the threat of frighteningly implied “constant eye shock,” the FlashFog also claims to offer protection for up to one hour, ensuring that the would be thief doesn’t just wait it out. FlashFog Securities also says that the fog leaves no residue or odor, stating on their web site that it won’t even effect tobacco flavor. So upon discovering your flashing, smoldering Mercedes, at least you don’t have to sweat the pack of menthols in the glove box. The machine itself also comes with a three year extended warranty, giving you the piece of mind that you won’t be enveloped by a terrifying, blinding cloud of fog while you’re on your way to pilates. At least not for three years.

“The fog is so thick that even finding the door is a great challenge. Finding anything to steal is virtually impossible.”

Honestly FlashFog sounds pretty fool proof and looks to be a logical evolution from the “This car is protected by Viper!” days. Just don’t freak out after dinner when you find a blinded car thief in your driver seat frantically groping for a door handle. What do you think? Hit the comment bar to leave some feedback.

1. DeusPayne says:
   March 8th, 2007 at 8:14 am

   Awesome. It’s not quite as nice as that system that shot flames out of the bottom of the car when the car was broken into, but still sweet.

2. Hushgush says:
   March 10th, 2007 at 10:02 am

   Looks pretty awesome. That’s a great idea, but I find it really hard to believe that it can pump out huge plumes of orange smoke without completely ruining the interior of the car.